Israel's National Sports Authority predicts Gold Medals for their boxing team.

Holocaust™ Sports Network

Tel Aviv--The Nationalist Sports Authority of Israel (Nazi) today announced that in the upcoming 2008 Olympics to be held in Beijing, China, that Israeli athletes would take the gold in both boxing and rifle marksmanship categories.

Beatum Thugman, Nazi coach of the boxing team, said his pugilists this year were in superb shape, thanks to all of the practice they've been getting beating up any and all protesters at Israel's Apartheid Wall.

Beatum said, "We rank our candidates on their ability to smash a protesters face into jelly, without using their rifle butts. If they use a truncheon, that's OK, since that type of arm movement simulates a punch to the face using one's fist."

"Of course, the safety of our Nazi boxers is of utmost importance", said Beatum. "We have our pugilists wear Kevlar reinforced leather gloves, so they won't cut their hands and bleed, since it is mandated by our holiest Rabbis that the blood of the Chosen Ones shall not mix with Palestinian mongrel blood" said Beatum.

Beatum further stated that it would be easy for Israel's Nazi boxing team to win the Olympic gold, since no other civilized country allows its boxers to beat a training opponent to the point of death, which Beatum said would give Israel's Nazi boxing team an advantage.

The Nazi coach of the marksmanship team, Saul Splatberg, said his rifle squads would capture the Olympic gold without breaking a sweat.

"Please, call me by my nickname, "SS", said Saul.

"We've been training our Nazi shooting teams in the West Bank and the Gaza strip. In the strip, one of the favorite targets of our sniping teams is the head of Palestinian children", said Saul. "At 500 meters, a child's head is about the same size as a bulls eye on a target 300 meters away. And with the practice our Olympic sniping teams have been getting lately, shooting Palestinian kids in the head, grabbing the gold at Beijing is a cinch", said "SS."

Both Beatum and "SS" agreed that there was no better way to celebrate what Israel was all about than for its boxing and marksmanship teams to win the gold at Beijing.

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Iran Medals Won

Summer Winter
Gold: 10 Gold: 0
Silver: 15 Silver: 0
Bronze: 21 Bronze: 0

 

Sport Medal Count
Taekwondo GOLD 1
  BRONZE 2
Weightlifting GOLD 4
  SILVER 3
  BRONZE 5
Wrestling GOLD 5
  SILVER 12
  BRONZE 14

Israel  Medals Won

Summer Winter
Gold: 1 Gold: 0
Silver: 1 Silver: 0
Bronze: 4 Bronze: 0

 

Sport Medal Count
Canoeing BRONZE 1
Judo SILVER 1
  BRONZE 2
Sailing GOLD 1
  BRONZE 1

Claymoremind | Sat, 2008-05-10 00:13

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